Siblings Are The Forgotten Grievers

Several times over the last year I have referenced my oldest daughter as the forgotten griever. Lately it’s been in my face. The idea haunts me. It shatters my heart into a million pieces. When a child dies, the focus is always on the parents. Siblings become the forgotten grievers. We overlook the impact. I have learned children don’t grieve … Read More

7 Is Too Young To Die

Story of Losing A Child

7 Is Too Young To Die was Originally published at Her View From Home. This was it. The moment I was dreading. The end. As I lay there in his hospital bed, holding him, I focused all of my attention on his chest. As the machine pumped, I could see it rise. Then lower. I tuned into the sound. Blocking … Read More

How Minnie Mouse Delivered A Message From Heaven

I love a message from heaven story. This is one I have not really shared. It’s one of my “this is going to sound crazy, but” stories. I typically reserve them for people closest to me. Those that won’t think I’ve completely lost my marbles. However, I believe they are important to share. Signs are everywhere! This story begins in February 2016. … Read More

The Importance Of Remembering Our Loved Ones – Cameron’s Reindeer Drive

Remembering our loved ones is the single most important goal. Nothing makes our heart happier than to have those around us help. Reindeer have always had a special place in our house. So when friends of mine decided to do something in memory of Cameron, a reindeer drive just made sense. I believe angels walk among us. These are the … Read More

Closure Doesn’t Exist In Grief

Grief requires closure to move forward. What if closure doesn’t exist? What a novel concept? One I hadn’t even considered until I watched Nancy Berns’ TED Talk titled, “Beyond Closure”. I have said it before and I will say it again. I love TED Talks. Inspiration delivered in 20 minutes or less that changes your entire perception on life. Why should … Read More

21 Things I Learned In Our First Year Of Loss

We have officially survived our first year of loss. I’m not really sure how. It doesn’t seem possible to be standing where we are today. I still wish I would wake up and have it all be a nightmare. Through this journey we have received a lot of advice. Nothing really prepares you. You simply learn to find comfort in … Read More

My Grief Amnesia – It’s Not You, It’s Me.

Grief amnesia. I’m not even sure if it’s a thing. However, it completely matches my reality. This has been a strange week. We are on the cusp of one year. The anticipation of dealing with those moments has me a bit overwhelmed. My mind is mixed between reliving every moment of last year combined with what feels like the first realization … Read More

11 Crazy Things I Do As A Bereaved Mother

Becoming a bereaved mother, my life has changed in ways I never expected. I’m not stating the obvious here. Yes, my life has been turned upside down since my son died. This is more behavior based. It’s quite possible these behaviors I’ve picked up are survival mechanisms. I can tell you I am on the journey of a lifetime related to … Read More

8 Balloons Found from Cameron’s 8th Birthday Memorial Launch

September 30th would have been Cameron’s 8th birthday. It was our first without him here. To celebrate, family and friends all over participated in their own balloon launches very similar to the one we did at his memorial last December. We were inundated with photos and videos of people sending balloons up to Cameron in heaven. I know he was enjoying the … Read More

Thank You PBS For Making Me Cry

It’s unexpected. I’m standing at the sink rinsing dishes, loading the dishwasher. There is nothing special about this moment. It’s something I do all the time. My mind is filled with normal thoughts. I need to go out and bring the trash cans back in so we can take out the recycling. Grocery lists. Did I start the crock pot … Read More