Like a lot of expecting or new moms, I frequent mom support boards for advice. This is my third baby. With each pregnancy I would find myself spending hours reading posts from other moms in their “birth club” rooms.
In theory it’s a great idea! First time moms asking their “dumb” questions. Women bonding over pregnancy woes. Then there are the countless “what should I name my baby” posts. It really has provided a lot of entertainment, and some good advice.
This time around things were a bit different! I quickly came to realize that women are bitches! While this is not a new concept, it is definitely on full display at this particular site…or should I say center for babies (See what I did there?). Where did the support go?
It would typically go like this. A mom would post something about her situation and ask for advice. It may be something about her baby daddy or mother-in-law. Believe me some of these posts are TMI. Maybe it’s something about the way she is feeling about being pregnant. In most cases the mom is turning to this board of moms for support (I know this is a big leap considering it’s called a mom support board).
As you begin reading the comments you quickly realize you need to grab the popcorn because things are about to get dramatic! The bashing that begins almost instantly is unreal. Finding fault with every decision they think the poster made or pointing out what they did wrong. In many cases telling them they are stupid for being in that situation. I’ve even seen them pretty much tell someone they are going to be a bad mother! Crazy!
My general rule of thumb has been if you can’t provide advice or offer support, don’t comment! That doesn’t stand for the majority of the rest though. It really does feel like high school. Everyone breaking off into groups and feeling they are better than others. Me, that innocent bystander that just can’t stop watching the train wreck.
What ever happened to “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all?” The internet has made it far too easy for people to bully and say the worst things to others and still maintain some anonymity. It’s sad really! With a little more support and understanding this world would be a much better place.
Why can’t we all just get along?