Kids Birthday Parties Suck

birthdays after death of a loved one

When your child dies, you understand how much kids birthday parties suck. I’m not necessarily just talking about other people’s kids birthdays. Your own kids birthdays are equally crappy. It is as if someone repeatedly stabs you in the heart all day. Constant reminders of what you had, what you are missing, and what will never be. It is no wonder … Read More

Grief Storms In When You Least Expect It

coping with loss

When you lose a loved one, coping with loss is something you do every day for the rest of your life. It is not a skill you put away and bring back out as you feel grief creep in. It becomes a part of your daily strategy to live. You identify your triggers and ways to deal with them so you … Read More

When Death Brings Gratitude

healing grief

Drowning in a sea of overwhelming grief is not where I expected to find gratitude. Yet there it was attempting to throw me a life line. I would have grasped at anything regardless of how out of place it seemed. Gratitude in grief? That is just crazy nonsense! When you lose a child, there is no way to explain the feeling … Read More

The Advice I Wish I Got After My Son Died

when my son died

When my son died, I received a lot of advice. I found people do not know what to say. They default to the things they have been conditioned to say during these times. It came from many different sources, most of which had never lost a child. The advice came from good intentions, but it was hollow. Not at all … Read More

The Best Grief Definition Is From A Griever

what is grief

What is grief? According to Webster, the grief definition is “a deep sorrow, especially caused by someone’s death to which a bond or affection was formed”. Grieving is to suffer grief. How can a word so full of emotion be so cold and unfeeling? Webster apparently never lost anyone. I remember standing beside his bed holding his little hand. My body in a … Read More

Bereaved Mothers: The Concept of Strength


There is a quote that says, “The bereaved mother. She has experienced the unimaginable and yet she is still able to walk.” When I see it, I question the definition of strength. There is this notion that because we can get out of bed every day, we are strong. The ability to do the necessities life has demanded means we … Read More

Grief And Loss – What Should Year 2 Look Like?

grief and loss

The first year of grief and loss is typically thought to be the hardest. You learn how to breathe again. You learn how to compartmentalize your life and manage (even mask) your grief. Survival through each milestone, creating a new normal, and learning how to keep going takes all of your energy and focus. So when we hit the first … Read More

When Life Has you Feeling Overwhelmed

child loss and grief

Life has a way of leaving you feeling overwhelmed. Things are going along like normal (new normal anyway) and bam! Out of nowhere it hits you. How did this happen? I think it happened when I walked away from the second mess of the day. I say I think because I really can’t remember. My ability to focus on things … Read More

6 Things I’ve Learned About Sibling Grief

loss of a sibling

There aren’t many resources that exist related to sibling grief. This fact has caused me to begin my own research. Who better to ask than those that have experienced this heartbreak first hand. The forgotten grievers themselves. While each has had their own journey, many themes stand out. I am a big believer in the statement, “You don’t know what … Read More

Siblings Are The Forgotten Grievers

Several times over the last year I have referenced my oldest daughter as the forgotten griever. Lately it’s been in my face. The idea haunts me. It shatters my heart into a million pieces. When a child dies, the focus is always on the parents. Siblings become the forgotten grievers. We overlook the impact. I have learned children don’t grieve … Read More